My old college friend and I had a very strange ritual. Almost religiously we would go to Taco Bell at the food court in Carousel Mall. We would get soft tacos (hers supreme, mine not), and carefully use our Spork (yes that's a spoon/fork combination) to remove all of the meat. Then we'd use about five mild sauces for each taco, and presto... gourmet meal for $3. I kid you not when I tell you we went like 5 times a week. Now, she started this ritual and I just followed along, so I usually let her field all of the questions that undoubtedly arose from friend's who came with us before realizing what they were getting themselves into. Questions like, "why don't you just ask for the tacos without the meat?" And she would say, "because I like the meat flavor." Hey, works for me.Ever since I've graduated, my brother and I have tried to uphold the ritual. It'd been a while since we'd gone, so we went the other night. I ordered 2 soft tacos and 1 steak soft taco, got my Spork and 100 mild sauces, and settled in to start the de-meating spectacle. However when I got to my last taco, I saw no steak. Que el fucko? I decided to go complain, since the steak was a whole 70 cents more and I actually planned on eating it. It ran through my mind that they may not believe me, although they don’t seem to hire the sharpest tools in the shed at the Bell. How could I prove that I hadn't already eaten the steak one? And then I glanced over at my tray, which displayed the remnants of my already eaten 2 soft tacos, ie, 2 piles of chopped meat, that my brother promptly picked up and said “if it please the court, I’d like to enter into evidence exhibits A & B...” I knew that ritual would come in handy one day...
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