We joked last year that we should all apply for truck driver licenses, however I think this year we should just be awarded them. We certainly earned it. I volunteered to captain the first leg of the journey home and ended up with the hazards on going 45 mph in blinding rain while Jay and Meredith slept. What I was doing could have more likely been categorized as boating not driving. Then Meredith took over the driving in stop and go traffic and ended up slamming on the brakes causing Jay, who was sprawled across the back seat, to go flying into the back of our seats. Nothing was funny about that, however for some reason we could not stop laughing. The kind of laughing that is actually painful. He wasn’t moving, just moaning and giggling for 25 minutes while tears flowed down my face. After all of this excitement and completing 12 hours on the road I’m not sure why between 3 decently smart individuals, nobody bothered to suggest stopping at a hotel to sleep, but we didn’t...
I can now say that I’ve slept in a car on the side of the road. Although not much sleeping went on for me because it was so cold in the car, I was literally shaking. I suppose now I know what it’s like to be a homeless person, or at least a slightly sophisticated homeless person who has a car but is dumb enough to think it’s a great idea to drive straight from Florida to New Jersey. Meredith and I were so overtired and basically looked how you’d expect a person would look after spending 22 hours straight in a car... Like the grim reaper. At a rest stop we caught our reflection in the bathroom mirror and stopped, horrified. Not even a tan could help us in that situation. Finally we arrived in New Jersey at 8am to find 20 degrees and snow. I was seriously contemplating turning around and going back... immediately. Well maybe after a nap... or a hibernation...
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